I remember not so long ago wondering if I would have feel right again. Would I be able to wake up in the morning and feel whole again. There was this hole in my heart that would never be filled but would it always be empty?
Over the past 2 years I have had opportunity after opportunity to minister with those who have experienced the loss of a baby. After 2 years I can look back and see the healing path I have taken. I will always miss Abijah. After crying out for so long for God to fill this void in my heart, He has. I have grown more dependant on Him and less on others and myself. The piece of my heart that was broken he has mended. It still aches at times, but I can still feel His overwhelming peace. After all, when you break a bone and it heals, doesn't the rain still make it ache. It does for me.
I can actually say I have found joy in my circumstance. He has taken something sad and hurtful and used it for good. My prayer is that this may provide you with some encouragement as you continue to face your days without your baby. May God grant us peace as we continue to find our new normal. We wait for the day when we will be made fully whole in Him who has given us life.
2 comments:
It's amazing how much helping others heals the own hurt in our lives! What a wonderful and compassionate God we serve to bring joy out of our sadness! I have complete joy when I think on Jael and Abijah! I love you sister!
I love to hear what you write. It was just a little over a year ago that I lost my son Caden. He was stillborn at 33 weeks. I thought that I would never know who I was again, but now as I see the impact his life made on others and how he still lives on through me and what I do, I am slowly getting used to this new me and I am at peace with God's plan for me right now.
Right now I am faced with wanting so desperately to help an aquaintance who just yesterday lost her baby girl to cancer, and while our circumstance were different, I know the pain she must be going through, and I want to help her and comfort her as much as is possible. Thank you for sharing in your journey through grief.
Post a Comment